Never mind the offside rule in football.. what about real life?

Share | Obviously men of a certain age and men of a certain mindset still think of women as stay at home babysitters whilst the hunter gatherer goes to work, drinks beer and watches footy.

I don't watch football regularly. I played as a Scout many years ago and at Uni I played 5-a-side. I have been to two Premier League games. I found the racism, agression from the fans and the segregation overwhelming. I couldnt wait to get home.

I dont understand those supporters to whom I have talked who love the agression directed towards opposing fans and the officials on the pitch.

I do watch rugby union. I played it for many years. I refereed for a while. I love the atmposphere and friendliness of rugby-although I have noted a tendency by commentators and supporters to start the "blame the ref" approach one associates with football.

Two really important people from Sky Sports were recorded having a private conversation about a female assistant referee before a game had started. Apparently football is a man's game, played by men, watched by men, run by men and organised by men. That's proabably why England do so well in competitions?

Lots of girls and women play football as they do rugby and other "male" sports. I have to say that my one experience of a female rugby referee was that she was really very badly treated on one occasion by drunken young men at Novos when she took charge of a game.

I also don't like the way some women feel able to talk about "men" as if somehow we are all the same.

Imagine if I walked into a school and started ranting at the headmistress because she was a woman. Or what if I ran up the ailse of a plane-or church-and ranted at the pilot-or the Minister-that she was a "f------g stupid bitch who knew nuthin about flying bloody planes -or communicating with God and preaching".

Would it matter if I was at home, in the bath, thinking such thoughts? Is it acceptable for me to think racist thoughts, sexist thoughts, thoughts of jealousy, evny and hatred so long as I dont express them "publicly"?

Can women referee premier league football? Of course they can.

Can women referee international rugby? Of course they can.

Can women fly aeroplanes? Yes.


Is what the Sky Sports presenters said-even though it was a private conversation- wrong? Of course it is. It cannot be justified by calling it "banter" or by saying "well women say men cant multi-task".

It was outdated, bigoted, ill-considered, opinionated rubbish-that is all too prevalent still in sport, the world of business and in the legal world.

I have two daughters. I wish for them to achieve the best they can. I want them to be confident enough in themsleves to be able to do what they wish. If they wish to be a home maker then fine. If they wish to work and have a family fine. If they wish to have a career only then fine. What I don't want for them is to be subject to the prejudices, bigotry and hatred that is still directed at women.

I have a son. When he was born-after two daughters-some said to me how happy I must be to have a son. I was happy he was born. I was happy he was healthy and my wife was healthy. I wasn't pleased that finally I'd got a boy because I didnt view the girls as trial and error until I'd finally hit the jackpot. I wish for him to achieve as I wish for my daughters. I suspect his life in business or in sport would be a lot easier than that of his sisters, if they were to choose that path.

That for me is the worst about what the Sky Sports presenters said. Women are still not allowed to strive for and achieve what they wish to strive for and achieve. There are still barriers, unnecessary and arbitrary limitations. Those barriers do not make sense. They are unjustified. Comments which suggest a justification for such barriers and limitations are unjustifiable.

Neither of the Sky Sports presenters has yet apologised. That's been done for them by their employer. Not man enough to say sorry or to explain their views?

Female Liberation. History and Current Politics

Cant take it with you

Share | Sir Gerry Robinson explores the pain and emotion that making a will can cause by exploring the desires of the will maker with family and friends before the will is made.

There is a presumption in this country that children have the right to inherit their parents' property. They do not. A parent can make a will and dispose of property however he or she feels fit.

Discussing these issues before hand can alleveiate strife, anger and dispute after death. Thinking carefully about how property should be disposed of is essential. Talking about these issues (a very unBritish thing to do) should become the norm.


However, more important even than a will are Lasting Powers of Attorney. Our facebook page (see link to right of this post) provides information on this issue as does our website.


Whether its a will, an LPA or probate then Emmersons can help.




 

PC Mitchell Jailed

Share | I wont get very technical about the sentence given to this Police man but he has been given an indeterminate sentence. That means he could stay in prison for life.

Could he be released? Yes
When? When the Parole Board consider that he is no longer a danger to the public, after 7.5 years.
How do they assess that? By reading reports from an Offender Superviser, Probation, other prison personnel, psychologists/psychiatrists. The reports refer to his performance on various courses, his general behaviour in prison and his mental health. His attitude to women would be assessed.
So he gets out after 7.5 years? No. That is the earliest date the Parole Board can consider him for release.
But he could get out shortly thereafter? Very very doubtful. Most IPP prisoners serve at least twice the tarriff before being released. Those who are considered a danger are not released.


If you want more information on IPP sentences then  you need look no further than our Facebook page
 

It’s those January blues again and Divorce is "very popular"!

At the start of January Tim dragged himself out of bed to go back to work after the Christmas break. He had not enjoyed the holiday period as he and his wife Sally had spent the entire time arguing. Just before he left for work Sally said that she needed to speak to him. What she said next came as a shock. She no longer loved him, she had found someone else and she wanted a divorce. She also said that he was to leave the house as soon as possible but that he could see the children on a regular basis. Reeling from this news Tim arrived at Emmersons solicitors for advice.



Tim was told that he had as much right to live in the matrimonial home as Sally. They should decide whether the house should be sold and the proceeds split between them (not necessarily in equal shares). Alternatively one of them could buy out the other’s share.

Tim was advised not to move out until these issues were sorted out. Things could become very difficult for him if Sally’s new partner decided to move in before all financial matters were settled! As far as the children were concerned, it was established that Tim had been a very hands on Dad. He was used to caring for the children when Sally was at work. He was used to taking them to school. There was no reason why Sally should decide that she should be the main carer.


Tim was asked to start collecting all of his financial documentation. This included details of his pension, savings and salary and the value of the matrimonial home. Sally’s solicitor would provide all of her financial documents. Then an offer could be put forward to settle matters.


Emmersons were able to liase with a mortgage advisor with Tim’s authority. Basic details were given, the idea being to find out how much by way of a new mortgage Tim could raise either to buy out Sally or to purchase a new home for himself.


Armed with this knowledge Tim advised Sally that he would not be moving out and that he would continue to take the children to school every day as he had always done. Sally was so desperate to be with her new partner that she moved out. She was prepared to allow Tim to buy her out. Whilst this is not a happy ending story it gives a flavour of how people can be helped with the right advice.

January is the busiest time for divorce lawyers. Christmas can be a very stressful time for couples who have been struggling to get along. They often find themselves thrown together for nearly two weeks and at the end of that time one party often feels that they can’t go on with the relationship. Anyone in this position should seek advice before making any rash decisions.

And don’t dismiss Relate as “not for me.” There are many out there who have lived to fight another day together.